8 Reasons To Hate The E39 M5

A mirror video of the one in which he showcased his appreciation for the M5, Parker from Vehicle Virgins is once again behind the wheel, this time tackling the downsides of the car, also known as those-who-shall-not-be-named-in-front-of-a-fan things.

Much like your latest gadget and even a brand new car, you will be excited at first. Later on, when the new toy novelty wears off, you will find yourself facing some issues, in the case of the E39 M5, detailed below.

Number one is occupied by Bluetooth connectivity; which, in this car, is completely absent – obvious, as the car was a 2001 edition. Not a deal breaker, but some people might appreciate placing a call or streaming music from their mobile device instead of fumbling through controls or trying to hide your phone so that the cops don’t see you – the latter, if you haven’t figured, is also dangerous so don’t do it. Aftermarket solutions exist, so you should look into it if you’re planning to buy such a car.

Number two, unlike a “regular” car, the M5’s maintenance costs tend to be quite elevated; as a consequence, you will end up paying much more than the acquisition cost. Various parts (we’re looking at you, flimsy cup holders) and consumables also need to be taken into account, so it’s better to keep that in mind before making a definitive decision.

Number three, brace yourself for a lot of gas bills, as the V8 is thirsty and unless you’re 150 years old, you won’t drive it under 30 all the time. You’re more likely to get better mileage on the highway, but a rough estimate would situate the mixed cycle mpg from 13.9 up to the mid 20’s. According to driving style and various other factors, such as the position of the stars, results may vary.

Number four deals with a double sided matter: the car is too subtle. On one hand, the driver appreciates it because it draws less attention, but on the other, non-connoisseurs will most likely not have the slightest idea they are looking at a 400 horsepower machine.

Number five, the age of the vehicle might also show through normal wear and tear. Plastics may rattle, while adhesives holding things in place may loosen the grip and slowly, unwanted noise will inevitably make way to your ears. However, it’s not a spaceship, so things are fixable; the only downside is that they cost money.

Number six, another issue Parker brings into discussion is that he tends to look at his vehicle once he gets out of it; but don’t we all? He considers it a bit of a bother, but we’d sit all day staring at beautiful cars, especially M5’s.

Number seven, despite being an impressive visual styling artifice, the special M design chrome rims will develop imperfections – in his case, the chrome layer was peeling off. Reconditioning is an advice, while aftermarket rims represents another alternative, but both bring with it anther joy.

That is, bills.

Number eight, the last point Parker makes, referring especially to North America, is that few people (younger, presumably) are incapable of driving a vehicle with a manual transmission.

And, as we know, the E39 M5 only has that option. It can represent a blessing, as your irresponsible mates cannot hoon your ride, but if you’re on a long drive and you want to rest, you will have to stop the vehicle and take a stroll or sleep on the ground, as no one will be able to help you with taking the wheel.

My hat is off to Parker for crafting another fun video of my favourite car. All things noted above aside, I still can’t find another car I like driving more.


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